What Do YOU Think?
There’s a way to help people grow mindfully, and it involves restraining your impulse to help them too quickly.
Most leaders have personalities that thrive on making fast decisions. The Dominance personality in the DISC relates to the driver or type-A personality that likes to move fast and seeks achievement. Though in the general population this personality makes up about 8% of people, in the executive world it shows up 50+% of the time.
One of the blind spots for many leaders is the urge to answer questions too quickly. It’s fun to answer questions. It feels good because it gives an immediate sense of accomplishment. However, it’s not always the best thing to do right away.
When a subordinate (or if you have them, children) asks a question, one of the best responses is NOT to answer it directly. First, consider whether the question should be asked of you in the first place. If it lies fully within the authority of the employee, the best answer is ‘You don’t need to ask me that. You’ve got this,’ so you don’t enable dependent behavior. If they still want your opinion, give it freely but only after asking in return ‘What do YOU think the answer is?’ Then, unless they are way off the mark, try to agree with them so they develop confidence in their decision making.
If the answer to the question they are asking is not in their authority, it is still good to respond by saying, ‘What do YOU think the answer is? What would you do if you were in my shoes?’ This allows you to see how they are developing in their decision making, and may surface an idea you wouldn’t have thought of.
For the rest of today and tomorrow, I invite you to pause when asked a question. Turn it around on the asker and use it as a coaching moment.
Until next time, Sherif